EJ's Closet

If you have never read  the blog of Caoimhe Lionheart you should take a look. She always has something mind catching  for you  (anchailinalainn.com) . The other day I was reading her blog which prompted me to write the following. I hope it’s not too much of a dive into the topic, but here goes…

I have never muted someone. I try not to do things in SL that I would not do in RL…although there have been times in RL when a mute button would have been nice to have, just like those sliders in appearance wold be a real treat.

I have been muted once that I am aware of and I have a vivid memory of the feeling that it brought. I said something that was totally misunderstood, taken the wrong way it was intended. The person replied in haste and before I had a chance to tell them their interpretation was not at all what I was trying to say, I was muted. It left me no way to respond and try to clarify. I can see why the feature is offered as there are many types of people in this little virtual world in which we play that may cause strife to someone else. Being this is supposed to be a creative and interactive place for fun it would be hard to achieve some sense of harmony here if you could be mercilessly harassed. When it happened to me it brought home something which such clarity I am almost glad it happened.
The thing that it made crystal clear for me is how important our words are in this environment. Our words are our singular source of communication for the majority of our interactions (leaving out the chat feature for this topic).

When this incident happened to me I mentally reviewed the past weeks and tried to think of any time when I may have mis-communicated. I probably over-thought it as I have a tendency to be overly analytical when given the option. I quickly jotted down a note to someone which in the end was a bad choice as it created more issues than it resolved.

So the end result of all this is that now I am more careful in my choice of words when typing conversations or messages. Tone of voice and vocal inflection do not exist in text. What may seem an innocent comment may be misread on the other end, even with careful crafting.

What am I suggesting with all this? Just to be mindful that if you have a doubt about what is said in text to you, whether in a virtual world, the real world via a letter or a text message, give the person the benefit of the doubt and allow for the person to clarify the meaning of what you think they said. Sometimes it may carry the exact same meaning that you understood. But sometimes, it may be that you have read a different meaning into someone else’s words. If they are someone you have any regard for they deserve an opportunity to explain themselves to you, as much as you would deserve the opportunity to explain yourself if misunderstood. I think we all owe it to ourselves to be less quick to judge one another.

P.S. I love these new shoes from Trinite. They come in so many colors and you can wear them with almost anything. 🙂

Goodies:

Dress – Lela Flute Lace, Lilac .:ryvolter:. @ Uber

Jewelry – Tear Drops, Amethyst, Chloe

Shoes – *NEW* Sophia, Nude, Trinite (9 colors available)

When I can manage, I follow a few Sl bloggers, one of which is Strawberry Singh. I’ve never done one of her ‘memes’ but I saw this one and just could not resist. I’ve been very inwardly retrospective the past few months while going through the process of settling a family estate. Going through the remains of two lives prompted me to reflect on my own. I had an unexpected period of downtime to mull over my life and where I want to go from here. It was a rather cathartic experience. I think that exercise has helped me achieve a balance through the past few months.

I think taking time to look at life goals and plan a bit is a good thing to do as long as you don’t allow yourself to get bogged down in the mire of self-doubt and regret. I made a promise to myself at a very young age to not ever get too wrapped up in past errors. I told myself to make thoughtful decisions based on the information at hand at the time, and then not to second guess those decisions later in life. So without getting too deep and reaching for those mental water wings, I will insert my responses to Strawberry’s meme from last week:

I am… thoughtful

I want… love and respect

I have… a big heart

I wish… the world was kinder

I hate… bullies (in all forms)

I fear… that I will not be my best

I search… for peace and sometimes for my car keys

I wonder… when manners became optional

I regret… when I don’t make a good first impression   and    missing out due to procrastination

I never… am deliberately mean

I always… cultivate the optimistic from people and life

I usually… fall short of perfect (sometimes more than others)

I dance…every day

I sing… loudly with my music while doing my cleaning chores

I often… smile

I sometimes…  want to run away to a tropical island with an amazing man

I cry… when I think of how much I miss my mom and her laughter, hugs, smile…

I need… the occasional bubble bath

I should… treat myself better

I love…the ways babies and puppies smell

I hope I did this exercise justice. If you do this meme try to write down your first thought on each line. Sometimes the first reflex of the mind is the most genuine. You might surprise yourself. I know I did.

Goodies:

Blouse – Bangalore top, White, Sascha’s Designs
Skirt – First Date Skirt, Navy, Boom at Uber
Shoes – Sass Pump Patent w/ HUD, Baby Monkey

Jewelry:
Necklace and earrings – Prophecy Set. Forest, Mandala at Uber
Ring – Auturo ring, Donna Flora
Bracelet – Celtic Dream, Gold, Magic Nook
Hair – Touch so Warm, Exile

“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you’ll find you get what you need” Mick Jagger & Keith Richards

As a model when we are issued a challenge, perhaps we first go to our inventory and see what we have. The next step might be to go to a store we know has the things we need. Then a cruise through Marketplace using a variety of search parameters.

So what to do when we can’t find that specific thing we are looking for? Like for this challenge of mixing dots and stripes. I just was not finding what I wanted. I had something in mind but it was nowhere to be found. I found the shoes I wanted and started with that color pallet, building from there. Ever try using mesh templates? They can seem a little scary at first, but with a little practice they can go from scary to fun. I am not advocating using templates for blogs since, as a model/blogger, we want to showcase designer items. I am just saying that when you need something specific and can’t find it, never be afraid to try and make what you need.  Happy shopping.

Coat: Ladies Punk Rock Full Length Coat, MELI IMAKO (textured by Josephine Aeon)

Tights: Dotty Pants, textured to match coat

Shoes: Stormy Boots, Sky

Earrings: Nyorai, MANDALA

Ring: Auturo ring, Donna Flora

Hair: Boys&Girls 16, Dark Brown, Dura

Lips: Tessa Lip Gloss, plum, WoW Skins

Eyes:    Nature Girl Moonstone, Dulce Secrets

Couture Eyeliner no.01, Glam Affair

Time for me to get comfy with my blog so I decided I should get in some comfy clothes to accomplish that. I just started a new job this week and with that comes all the butterflies and uncertainty that a life change event brings. This change, however, is a welcome one as I am working with a former boss who I admire and respect. He must have liked something about me too since he was the one to ask me to come work for him. It’s nice to have that warm feeling that comes when you feel as if you are welcomed, appreciated, and your skills are valued. I have come to the point where I realize how important it is to have a job you love showing up for. It’s the golden goose, the brass ring, the pièce de résistance in the workplace.

This week I have been happily popping around events to find some new comfy weekend togs to treat myself and celebrate and I found just the right things at  Collabor88. This roomy white t-shirt fits perfect with these NewsBoy pants from Fashionably Dead. I love the playfulness of them. I paired them with a simple flannel shirt from Emery tied around the waist so it’s handy to make sure I don’t get cold as the last of winter is still in the air. I added a ring from Swallow because I just have to have my touch of bling before I venture out into the world.

Stay positive and have fun, don’t let the cold of winter get you down. Haven’t you heard…? Spring is just around the corner.

Goodie List:

Shirt: My Love, White, Fashionably Dead (Collabor88)
Pants: Newsboy pants, Coal,  Fashionably Dead (Collabor88)
Shirt at waist: Lumberjack shirt 03, Emery (Collabor88)

Ring: Eros ring, Swallow (Collabor88)

Hair: Lithium, Mithral Apothecary (Collabor88)

Collabor88 link:  http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/8%208/91/206/1086

…literally. This is the time of year when I go outside to find a thin layer of lovely yellow dust coating my car and well, every surface. This is what tells me that the flowers and trees are waking up from the long winter. It’s my favorite season when the days are growing longer and the temperatures are starting to rise and warm the ground awakening the plants. It’s also when I get somewhat introspective. Spring is the start of my year. A time when I look back at the past year and think of what it meant to me. Last year was a bumpy year, but in spring there seems to be a positive energy looking forward towards new possibilities. I have promised myself to make this year a good one. I am planting flowers this weekend, so when I come up the walkway to my front door, I will be greeted by an explosion of blossoms and color. The other great thing about spring is it means the return of a bright color pallet for the season. I returned to Calas Galadhon Park Sims to snap this shot near the front steps of the farmhouse. Nothing like a warm spring day to make you feel the need to pull on a pair of short and go for a stroll in the fresh air…well somewhat fresh air.

Shirt & Shorts: *COCO* Shirt&Shorts (Light Blue)
Cardigan: *COCO* JacketOverShoulders (Small Flowers)
Shoes: Meli Imako Peep toe Stiletto Heels with Buckle Ankle Boots
Earrings: Lazuri Lasya
Hair: CaTwA, Sama
Location: Calas Galadhon Park Sims

I was feeling very much into spring today. The warmth of the days has begun to tease me into wanting to be outside planting flowers, but it’s not yet time. Maybe next week it will be time to venture out and plant some flowers in the hopes of a colorful display over the months leading into summer. I can’t imagine a spring without some flowers to care for and enjoy. So until I can plant them I will wear them.
The perfect spot to take a walk on a lovely spring day are the Calas Galadhon Park Sims. The creators there present a new look every season and the sims are amazing. Go and see them and while you are there, support them by dropping some linden in their donation box to help keep them there for eveyone to enjoy and play in.

Dress: HHC The Bethany Dress
Shoes: N-Core GLANCE Yellow
Jewelry: MG Bracelets and Earrings Honey Diva Bo Bo; Rings: MG Maya Sun Goddess & MG Roho Gold-Silver
Purse: *COCO* Satin Clutch Blue
Make-up: Eyes, Madrid Solo – Show Designs Venti Chai
Location: Calas Galadhon Park Sims

As I sit here to open my blog I am thinking ‘What does one write for their inaugural post when starting a blog?’ I realize that a blog is anything the blogger wishes to share with the reader. No spectacular grand gesture is required; just get to the business of creating it. So to start perhaps I will just offer up what I wish to share in my blog. I wish to share my love of fashion and a bit of my joy for all that is good in life mixed in with a dash of the reality that life sends our way. The only way we can recognize the good things in life is to have some experience of what defines the bad. Knowing this, we learn to accept the bad so that we may be able to recognize, appreciate, and enjoy the good we may be fortunate to experience. Yes, you have guessed it, I am an optimist. I admit it. I support the up side of life and believe in the basic goodness of people. Oh yes, I acknowledge there is a bad side of life and people, but I choose to look for, and expect, the good. I have learned that you most often find the thing you seek, so I choose to seek the warm fuzzy bunny, sunshine, and white fluffy cloud side of life. So here I am, hoping to share my take on style and fashion and placing my thoughts out there for the world to see. I hope I can uplift you and enrich your day when you are gracious enough to pay me a visit on these pages. Warmest regards, EJ.

At my desk